The Best Way to Establish a Relationship with a Prospect

Over my 25 years of prospecting, I've learned that true business success isn't just about closing deals – it's about building meaningful relationships with prospects. While this might sound like Sales 101, most salespeople still get it wrong, focusing on transactions instead of connections that drive value for both parties. I want to share a few critical lessons that have transformed my approach to prospect relationships. These insights go beyond the obvious "know your customer" and dig into what really matters: demonstrating expertise, shifting your mindset from selling to helping, balancing business and personal connections, understanding priorities, and being selective about who you engage with.

How To Build Relationships With Prospects

Let's get real about what a prospect relationship actually means in today's business environment. It's not just about having their contact info or connecting on LinkedIn – it's about building rapport; becoming a trusted resource they turn to when facing challenges in your area of expertise. Think of it like being their industry GPS: they might not need directions right now, but they know you'll guide them to the right destination when they do.

The numbers tell the story: According to Salesforce, 84% of business buyers are more likely to buy from sales reps they trust, and prospects who feel a genuine connection are 5.2 times more likely to engage in a business conversation. Here's what's even more compelling: when you establish trust, your average deal size increases by 35%, and customer retention jumps by 27%.

Here's the tricky part – building these relationships in our digital-first world requires a different playbook. You can't rely on random coffee meetings or conference run-ins anymore. Instead, you need to:

• Don’t just aim for lead generation. Everyone on your sales team should position themselves as a thought leader where prospects already hang out online. Share insights on LinkedIn, participate in industry forums, and contribute meaningful comments to discussions they care about.
• Join and actively participate in your prospects' professional groups and online communities. Don't just lurk – add value to conversations and share your expertise or even ask follow up questions to extend the back and forth.
• Follow their company updates and social media presence to understand their challenges and wins before you even reach out.

The secret sauce? Research and preparation. Before any interaction, you should know:

• Their company's recent announcements and strategic initiatives
• Industry challenges they're likely facing
• Their role and responsibilities within their organization
• Content they've engaged with or shared professionally
• Any mutual connections or shared experiences you can authentically reference

Think of it like being a detective, but instead of solving crimes, you're solving business problems. The more homework you do, the more likely you are to spot opportunities where your expertise intersects with their needs.

Now, what I’m not JUST describing is ‘relationship selling.’ That concept has gotten a bit played out. I’m talking about what that is supposed to mean: relationship building.

Prospects can smell generic outreach from a mile away. When you show up prepared with specific insights about their business and industry, you're not just another sales rep – you're in ‘trusted advisory territory,’ with a real shot at becoming a partner in their success. And if you want more deals and lasting relationships, that's exactly where you want to be.

5 Tips To Plan Better Interactions With Prospects

Successful prospecting isn't about following a rigid script or checking boxes on a sales process flowchart. It's about building rapport with honest authenticity that demonstrate your value while respecting your prospect's time and priorities.

Here are five strategies that have consistently helped me turn cold prospects into long-term business relationships.

1. Know Your Stuff/Be A Subject Matter Expert

Potential customers — especially leaders — don't waste time with salespeople who can't teach them something new.

Think about it – they just walked out of a board room with company objectives and strategies they believe will work.

But here's the thing: the best leaders know there are gaps in their knowledge, and they're actively looking for trusted advisors who can fill them.

Your job? Be that expert. But not just any expert – be the one who understands their world so well that you can spot the blind spots they haven't even considered yet. When I talk about fishing (and I mean real fishing, not just standing on a boat with a beer), I can tell within minutes if someone really knows their stuff or if they're just repeating stories they've heard. Your prospects can do the same with you.

Speak with what I call "executive presence" – communicate at a high level while making it clear you can dive six levels deep into any aspect of the conversation if they ask. When you do this right, you're not just another vendor; you're a valuable resource they actually want to hear from. It’s how you build long term relationships and actual personalized experiences (not just the AI versions).

2. Stop "Selling"

Let's be brutally honest – your motive is transparent. With over 15 million sales reps out there and billions of web pages of information at everyone's fingertips, the old "provide information and present smoothly" approach is dead. Your prospects can smell a sales pitch from a mile away.

Here's the mindset shift that will change everything: Your job isn't to sell. Your job is to help prospects decide if they should do something different, and if so, what that something should be. Sometimes that means working with you, and sometimes it doesn't.

Try this exercise: This weekend, help your kid pick out new sneakers. Don't care what they choose – just help them make the best decision for them. Really put yourself in their shoes (pun intended) and think about what matters: the potential excitement or embarrassment at school, comfort, durability. When you genuinely focus on helping them make the right choice rather than pushing for what you think they should get, you'll see exactly how this approach should feel in your professional interactions.

Prospects become clients when you give them ample time before offering a service; when they hear personalized recommendations that take into account their goals, when they’re on the receiving end of check ins that align with their interests. Building strong relationships isn’t something to do after you close. If you exceed expectations every step of the way, you’ll be building the trust that turns into something more.

3. Build a Business and Personal Relationship

Yes, you might both be Yale alumni or share a passion for golf. That's great – but it's not enough. While personal connections can open doors, they won't keep them open if you can't deliver business value. Conversely, focusing solely on business without any personal rapport can make your relationships feel transactional and replaceable.

The key is balance. Lead with business value – show how you can help solve problems and achieve objectives. But once that foundation is established, don't be afraid to build genuine personal connections. The goal isn't to get on the same page about everything and be best friends; it's to create a professional relationship where both parties feel comfortable being authentic while maintaining focus on business outcomes.

Think of it this way: Business value gets you in the door and keeps it open, while personal connection makes the relationship more resilient and enjoyable for everyone involved.

4. Understand Their Highest Priority (Even If It's Not You)

Here's a hard truth: The perfect solution to a low-priority problem will always lose to a decent solution to a high-priority problem. Your prospect's whiteboard probably has 8-10 major initiatives on it, minimum. Your solution? It might be number 11.

Instead of banging your head against the wall wondering why they're not returning your calls about your "perfect fit" solution, ask this crucial question: "Where does this sit on your priority list?" If it's not at the top, don't waste time asking why. Ask what is at the top and explore how your solution might connect to those higher-priority initiatives.

Sometimes, you'll find your solution ties directly into their major priorities. Other times, you'll need to make your solution easier to implement or show how it can support their bigger objectives. Either way, understanding and acknowledging their priorities shows respect for their reality.

5. Be Selective

Not every prospect is right for you, and you're not right for every prospect. This isn't just about accepting rejection – it's about being strategically selective yourself. Some prospects will never engage, no matter how perfect your solution or how brilliant your approach. That's okay.

Focus your energy on prospects where there's mutual fit and value. Look for organizations where your expertise aligns with their needs, where their culture matches your approach, and where both parties can benefit from a long-term relationship. Being selective isn't just about managing your time – it's about ensuring you're building relationships that have the potential to be genuinely successful for everyone involved.

Remember, every "no" gets you closer to the right "yes." Don't waste time trying to force fits that aren't there. Instead, keep refining your ideal prospect profile and focus your energy where it matters most.

Create Win-Win Relationships With Prospects

Building meaningful relationships with prospects isn't just about hitting your sales targets – it's about building trust that drives value for everyone involved. The most successful business relationships I've built over the past 25 years have one thing in common: both parties walk away feeling like they've won.

Here's what it all boils down to: Be the expert who helps prospects make better decisions, not just another salesperson pushing for a quick close. Focus on understanding their priorities, delivering real business value, and building authentic connections that go beyond surface-level networking.

Take action today:

• Audit your current prospect list. Are you focusing your energy on relationships with genuine potential for mutual success? Or are you just sending endless follow up emails and asking open ended questions to the void?
• Review your latest interactions. Did you lead with expertise and value, or did you fall back on generic sales tactics that have nothing to do with a prospect’s interests?
• Look at your preparation process. Do you fully understand the person ou’re talking to? Are you doing the deep research that enables you to have meaningful conversations about what really matters to your prospects?

Most importantly, remember that building strong prospect relationships is a skill that improves with practice. Every interaction is an opportunity to refine your approach and demonstrate your commitment to creating genuine business value.

Ready to transform your approach to prospect relationships? Let's talk about how ASLAN’s training can help you and your team develop the skills and mindset needed to build lasting, profitable business relationships. Our proven methodology has helped thousands of sales professionals move beyond traditional selling to become trusted advisors their prospects actually want to engage with.

Book a consultation today to learn how we can help you turn prospects into long-term partners.

Marc Lamson

As President of ASLAN, Marc is responsible for all day-to-day operations including our sales and marketing efforts and growing our success in helping our clients be Other-Centered®.